i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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