I CAN MOONWALK!
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
