Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
