oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
