I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
false alarm, still single
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
