I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
