guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
