I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
