Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
