she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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