Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
