If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
