I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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