No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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