i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
