Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Randomize
