Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
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