I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
