Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
