Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Let's get the cat blown out
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
