I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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