can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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