Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
