I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
