so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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