You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
