I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
