...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Sober January is a disaster.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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