But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
