My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
