so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
You ate ashes out of my bong
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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