Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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