Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
