I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize