This girl is more easily done than said...
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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