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I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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