do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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