you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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