i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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