You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
