In the future we'll all be gay
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
