Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
