While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize