Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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