Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
