Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
