I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize
