Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize