Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Randomize
