Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Need sex. Gaining weight.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Please don't give away my fajitas
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
