It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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