Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
